I am crushing on my Chemistry tutor and that’s weird considering it has only been four years since I told my friends how I thought I was a lesbian. Even though since then, I have come to the realization (multiple times actually) that I am bi (/pan/ whatever-ace, detailed labels are not not my thing), it’s still strange to acknowledge that. And of course it’s not that I am now only attracted to men! (or whatever). Hopefully, my flatmates – who I am not out to (although they should know that in theory (and in the past) I like(d) girls) – won’t think so! But I guess me crushing on a guy slightly older than me very much fits with their perception of me, which is similar to how I used to think of myself when I was fourteen.

And he is “my type” if I ever had one: a chemist, long dark hair kept in a halfway done ponytail, glasses and a beard, septum piercing, shirts of relatively old post hardcore bands, not much taller than me, slim (as in not broad or overly muscular) and a voice that I would listen to for hours on end. Also he is diligent, soft spoken and confident with a calming sense of humor, willing to put so much effort into his studies and us learning (so much!). And  he has laughed at what I said and has acknowledged my contributions. I feel like he values us and his work a lot. Also, he was so sorry for not having time to answer our questions the afternoon before the exam because he had made plans to go to an otter information centre (a collective “awwwww” was heard from the audience). And now I don’t know what to do about this situation. He will give another tutorial next semester, but I might be studying at a different university by then.

Soooo, what else is new? Apparently I’m into geology and chemistry now, also statistics. And I wish to be a tutor for statistics or (theoretical!) chemistry or physics at some point in the future.

volumeun:

bondedwiththesea:

samtempl:

when you’re younger, being smart and being able to pass classes easily without studying is not a good thing

because then when you hit a point where you do have to study for classes, you have no idea how to study

And then you end up sitting staring at your book for 2 hours thinking to yourself: Maybe if I sleep on it some sort of book osmosis will occur and I’ll absorb the information from my book into my mind

And then you cry.

I started university last week and there’s no wifi in my flat (currently).

Basically, the whole goal of our orientation week is to improve the image of our uni and the officials are mostly just celebrating themselves while most of the students are far less impressed.We’re working in interdisciplinary groups to develop campaigns about social challenges arising from diversity (oh so amazing, as I said, the officials are pros at self-adulation) and it’s actually somewhat interesting. I was really frustrated at first, but as it turns out, there’s some super ambitious students in my group, which means I get the chance to be more of an observer, making critical remarks, writing texts and training the others in performing them. That part is fun actually, although 10+ hours of uni each day are draining, but it will probably get better.

So, that’s probably the start of that oh-so-great new part of my life.

We’ll see how this turns out.