If food/eating is tearing your life apart you have an eating disorder.
It’s nice that this attitude is being spread now. 5 years ago I was only exposed to the opposite which kind of fucked me up and fucked me over for 2+ years.
Schlagwort: ed
Talking to myself
You know what? They might be right. I know it can’t just continue like this – but I am so damn scared.
The past 24 hours have probably been the hardest 24 hours in my life so far.
It is neither the hunger nor the lack of willpower, not even the constant presence of what you have to ignore – it is the complete physical and mental exhaustion that makes it so extremely painful.
That does not mean I am going to stop though.
I have never felt that comforted by a simple bottle of water.
Maybe if I just allow myself to get as bad as I feel the need to get today, tomorrow my mother will actually believe me that I feel like shit.
I am really fucking scared that I might just break down in swimming lessons tomorrow. But I can’t skip school in the first week, can I?
Shit. I do not want to show my body and I do not want to eat, but I will have to do both tomorrow.
The Light in the Sky 